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Wed, November 30
Must...Stop!
I need to stop reading other people's blogs. I wonder if writers were able to write more before blogs existed. Of course, every blogger is writing a book. The competition! Who even reads this blog? Besides my family members...Oy. Feeling down.
Taking a "half writing day" from work to work on a manuscript. The "Boo Boo Book." Something to be proud of right?
Wish I could spend all day listening to unidentifiable folk music at BagelZone on Ave. A. Listening to other people's conversations. Checking my email to see if J has written me back.
But...I've hit the 60 page mark of my "book" (my own book-not the Boo Boo Book). The good news.
Ran into Paulie while I was here. He's unemployed so he comes here for a bagel every day. Looking for jobs in criminal law. He's seeing a therapist. Who isn't? God, is everyone on friggin medication these days?
I could get used to the writer's life. Even though its wholly frustrating and I feel like taking a nap after every page I write.
After reading Belle's blog
http://belleinthebigapple.blogspot.com/
I am oddly jealous and disquieted.
Hi Grandma and Grandpa, by the way! J and I had a great Thanksgiving at your house. It was great having so much family there wasn't it? Thank you for the cacti. Unfortunately, an awful looking spider crawled out of one of the pots and we had to kill it, fearing an African Spider epidemic or something like that. :)
OK, time to shut down the computer (and my day of writing) and go to work. P&L's to figure out! Paperwork to do! Acquisitions meetings to prepare for!
My boss is at Stan Berenstain's funeral today. I'm sad about it, the funeral. Even though I never knew Stan personally, I feel close to him because I grew up on his books and got to work with him indirectly on a book last year. And it drives it closer to home knowing my current boss and ex boss are at his funeral. But because I never met him, I can't shake the image of the actual father bear of the Berenstain Bears having passed away. :(
Posted by lexzog at Wed, November 30 | Comments (0)
Mon, November 21
The Monday Report
Whirlwind weekend-o-fun: Friday night started out tame enough. J and I went to services at a nice Conservative temple near Gramercy. There definitely is a “community” there, as with every guest that walked in, there were hellos and whispers in the ear. J and I were especially entertained by an old black woman in the pew across from us who knew Friday night services by heart, putting this curly-haired, Teaneck-bred Jewish girl to shame.
After doing the “good Jewish kids” thing, naturally, we went to get drinks at Schaeffer City, an oyster bar off 5th ave. I’d been reading a lot about martinis (in my aforementioned book The Washingtonienne) and had an odd craving for an extra dirty one with olives.
Thou shalt not drink on an empty stomach.
After a couple of phone calls we met up with Carl on West 4th St. at a restaurant called “Extra Virgin”. We drank wine while waiting for a table, and Dena arrived just in time right before we were seated. The four of us ate and laughed the night away. The highlight of the meal was Dena’s appetizer (reluctantly ordered because it was so decadent), which was sweet potato ravioli and a butter sauce. Like the waitress promised it “was almost like a dessert.” I loved my grilled yellowtail snapper in a saffron sauce. When we were just about to leave, Clara and Josh and some friends showed up but we were so beat we couldn’t stick around for long.
Saturday morning I went to art class and was happy to see my coworker Anna had come too, as she had hoped when I spoke to her Friday. I was also happy that the model that inspired the one sketch I was proud enough to hang on my wall in my apartment was there, because it is good to sketch someone familiar looking.
Right after class I had to meet Inner Monologues peeps for a workshop. Since almost all of them are stand up comedians, I’m learning to get to the punch line faster in my pieces, instead of drawing them out short-story book style. Funny, I can go on and on with a short story that I’ve written, but when it comes to the book I’m trying to write I am so stymied.
I hadn’t eaten all day, so it was nice that Dena was able to meet me at Bagel Zone. Love that Amsterdam bagel (goat cheese, walnuts, honey and thyme). She worked on her designs while I tried to write but ended up reading more chick lit.
Noa’s party was a blast. Was great to see Linz, Karina, Dave, and of course the birthday girl. I was especially happy that Dara was able to show up. Too bad we lost her friend at some point in the night, after seeing her talk to some tall guy on the dance floor. Though the line to get into Manahatta is quite annoying and makes everyone feel un cool and second class, the downstairs hip hop dance party makes up for it. It felt like one of those nights back in the day when I used to go out with all my girlfriends till the wee hours. Only this time, any time a nasty looking guy (or any guy) tried to dance with me, I could mosey on over to J so he could lay claim. Or, pull the “here’s my lesbian girlfriend” move with any of my female friends (though that tactic has worked less and less over the years).
Dena, J and I had late night dinner at Lil’ Frankies. Thirty bucks for pizzas. But worth it!
Yesterday J and I had a wedding in Long Island. We drove with the top down in his mom’s Benz even though it was a tiny bit chilly. The reception was beautiful and proved that you can do black tie in a Jewish Community Center—that is, if the center is in a ritzy part of Long Island. And, kosher food has come a long way. From the short ribs over fried onions and mashed potatoes in a martini glass, to the seared tuna and salmon over sticky rice with teriyaki sauce, I thought I was at a four star restaurant. Had a really fun time with J’s friends Frannie and Danny (yes, it is fun to say). The best man’s speech was hysterical—I would have asked him to be in my show if he didn’t live in Miami. But at the beginning of his speech I misheard his joke about “two donkeys and a can of Crisco” and thought he said “two darkies” at which point I was ready to get up in a huff and lose my appetite. But even still…I don’t get the donkey joke. Anyone care to explain?
Ultimately pooped this Monday afternoon. Meeting Jules and Dara for dinner tonight. Woohoo more eating!
Posted by lexzog at Mon, November 21 | Comments (0)
Tue, November 15
She is so Bleep-Damn Annoying!
So New York Mag ran an article about sex columnists (oddly enough, I've read/met/heard of all of them before this article even came out):
It would have been a great article, if Miss. "Look at Me" Cutler (author of self exploitative book "The Washingtonienne") hadn't been the main focus...I am furious at some of the things she said... Here are a few highlights:
(When the girls were asked if any of them were seeing therapists, Cutler said:)
Of course: Strattera. It’s just an antidepressant medication. It helps me write faster. Actually, when I wrote my book, I got Adderall from my friends, and I was typing like a maniac. And that’s the thing, yeah, that and snorting coke helped me write the book really fast.
My favorite part of the article though:
Sohn: Did you sleep with him?
Cutler: Oh, yeah, of course. I’ve dated a couple of fans. Why not?
Sohn: Aren’t you afraid that someone is going to be totally psycho?
Cutler: I love the psycho ones! What’s he going to do, kill me?
Nersesian: Yeah.
Cutler: What a relief that would be.
And finally, almost to no one's surprise:
When it came time for a group photo, Cutler opened her flasher-style trench coat and bared her left breast.
Yeah. All you young novelistas--guess of you want your book published you should consider acquiring a coke habit, and baring a breast. But if you REALLY want to set yourself apart from Miss Cutler, I recommend baring your right breast.
Posted by lexzog at Tue, November 15 | Comments (0)
Mon, November 14
Yuck! Friendster Sucks.
Wasn't it fun for that brief moment when Friendster allowed you to view other people's profiles anonymously while YOU got to see who had been viewing YOUR profiles in pure vain secrecy? Well, party's over because now Frienster has decided to make things FAIR. I thought it was fair before--if people were either too stupid to change their profiles so that they too could view others anonymously or purposely chose to keep it not anonymous--that was THOSE PEOPLE'S PREROGITIVES!
I feel like I'm in kindergarten. Now I have to play fair. And now every time I click on some person I went to highschool's friend's friend's friend's profile (for no reason except that I'm curious and like spying--is that so wrong?) that person will now think that I am a STALKER. Which I'm not. I'm just curious. Yep. Curious.
And every time I click on my boyfriend's profile to link to his ex girlfriend's profile to see if she has FINALLY put a damn picture up (since I have no idea what she looks like), he's going to think I just like to stare and admire his pictures all the time. Or that I'm spying on him. Which I'm not. Not really.
Really, I'm not! :)
Hate Friendster...
Posted by lexzog at Mon, November 14 | Comments (0)
Shannon's Bday (and Cupcakes!)
Posted by lexzog at Mon, November 14 | Comments (0)
This is What Happens When You Leave Manhattan
Saturday night...Driving to Bushwick in a cab with three French people (Thomas and his friends)and a taxi driver who had no idea how to follow directions. I fell asleep somewhere along Broadway under the L train...I felt like it was taking forever, and was woken up to a call from J (who had taken a separate taxi)who had had arrived at the party over fifteen minutes before. "Where are you?" he asked. Well, none of us really knew. Not even the taxi driver. I asked to see the directions that J had printed out for us with a little map--directions that we even gave to the driver to follow himself. We were supposed to go on Broadway for only .5 miles and turn onto Montrose St. but ended up cruising on Broadway for 20 minutes. The cabbie was so nervous he was shaking. We pulled over and stared at maps of Brooklyn for another 20 minutes...Finally made it to the party, ready for fun and to forget the frustrating ride.
The party was worth it--it was considered the "after party" to an all day art show that had happened earlier that day, featuring art from lots of young up and coming artists. We walked in, got our hands stamped, and found ourselves in a huge woodshop that had been converted into a rave-like atmosphere: White sheets were from cieling to floor, reflecting different colored lights, or serving as screen projectors for the various "EJ"'s around the room. Digital figures that looked like computer screensavers swirled and moved all over the screens seemingly in time to the pulsing beats of the music.
We danced on tables and C. videotaped the whole thing with his digital camcorder...I've never been into techno or house music, but it wasn't hard to fall into some kind of rythm. The lights, the sounds, all of it was such an overwhelming experience...an orgy for the senses. I imagine it was the kind of party that would have been even more amazing if I ever did drugs, but happily, I enjoyed it on the more sober side. Unfortunately, I couldn't keep myself into it for longer than the three and a half hours we stayed before I told J I was exhausted (had woken up early that day for art class on top of a very long week at work). Thank goodness J brought cupcakes for the ride home (his new roomate likes to bake--yay!) because by 4am, I was hungry all over again.
More later...
Posted by lexzog at Mon, November 14 | Comments (0)
A Forward: Best response to a personal ad ever.
I don't know these people, but someone forwarded this to me...
-----Original Message-----
Subject:
Julie replied to a personal add on Craigs List. And below is his
reply
to her.
You have to read this. It is unbelievable the nerve this guy has! What
a ass!
BTW, Julie wants me to share this....she can't believe this guy!
(there are pics attached)
-----
Here ya go.... enjoy!!!
>
>Julie,
>
>Hey there, congratulations! You were one of the over 30 crowd--over 30
>being score not age, although you got that one too! :) You know at
>first, I
saw
>your picture and was like uhhh, well, um, I don't know. She's not
>really
a
>knockout. However, the more I looked at your features, the more I
>thought that you could easily be a knockout.
>
>PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don't take this the wrong way.
>
>I am a big fan of great eyes and a great smile. You definitely have
>the smile down pat, however the eyes need some help. I am not talking
>about anything major at all, just a good eyebrow waxing or threading
>and a bit
of
>eye shadow and liner.
>
>No I am not gay. No I am not a cosmetologist. I just had a girlfriend
for
>six years and I have been to many a makeover in Macy's with her so she
>could get the half off price on her foundation. Anyway, she had eyes
>shaped
very
>similar to yours, and each time the cosmetologist (who, by the way, was
>gay--not that there's anything wrong with that!) recommended that she
>have someone shape her eyebrows and wear a plum-colored eyeshadow and
>eyeliner that opens up the eyes. Anyway, to show what I am talking
>about, check
out
>your attached picture of the before and after, which was touched up
>with photoshop. The only things I changed were the eyebrows, added
>eyeshadow and eyeliner. I am sure that you agree that the after photo
>is wonderful!
>
>I am not a huge fan of makeup as I believe if one is wearing a lot,
>they have something to hide. You don't wear much makeup which is good.
>You have great complexion, hair, smile and you seem like a great woman
>so far from your e-mail, however as I said before, I am a huge fan of
>eyes and smiles if
>you have someone shape your eyebrows, I would definitely be willing to
talk
>with you more.
>
>Please don't think I am some materialistic little brat. I am not.
>Also,
I
>am not about changing women to be my "dream girl". However, I do
>believe that physical attraction is important initially and I am much
>more attracted to the woman on the right rather than the woman on the
>left.
>
>My picture is also attached, so if you believe me that I am not a brat
>and am not out to change you around and you are interested in learning
>more about me, e-mail me back.
>
>Thanks so much for the initial response and if you do go to the salon
>to get an "eye makeover" please wear a bag over your head on the way
>home so you don't pick up a bunch of guys before e-mailing me back! ;)
>
>Have a wonderful weekend and I hope to hear back from you.
>Jay
>
>PS if you have any suggestions for me, I am all ears :)
>
>----- Original Message -----
>From:
>To:
>Sent: Saturday, July 12, 2003 6:57 PM
>Subject: Great ad!!!!
>
>
> > Hi Jay-
> >
> > My name is Julie, and your ad simply cracked me up! (My score was
> > 33, BTW... )
> >
> > My photo is attached... I'm 34, I live in San Jose, work in Menlo
> > Park
> > (yes- I still have a job- woohoo!!), have lived in the Bay Area for
just
> > over 5 years. I'm a surfer in training, I learned to ski this
> > winter
>(I'm
>a
> > late bloomer), I have a mountain bike (though I admit, it hasn't
> > been
>used
> > as much as it should lately), and I like to hike and rollerblade as
>well.
>I
> > do a lot of volunteer stuff as well.
> >
> > Anyway, that's my spiel. Have a great weekend!
> > Julie
> >
Julie
Jay
Posted by lexzog at Mon, November 14 | Comments (0)
Fri, November 11
Been busy...
On Sunday I went to a writer’s conference at Barnard, and all I walked away with was the following:
1)I am not worthy of being a published author.
2)Yet I am capable of writing something if I put my mind to it.
3)Getting published should not be my goal.
4)Other people are desperate and it is ugly.
I swear this crowd of Barnard women from twenty-somethings to people in their eighties were just clawing and scratching to capture pieces of wisdom from the published authors that spoke at the conference. I hate those kinds of people and that kind of atmosphere. Its like people who never wash their hands after touching the napkin that a celebrity like Brad Pitt has touched. Its like they think that if they sit in the presence of greatness it might just rub off on them if only a tiny bit.
The one good thing about the conference was that it made me more hungry to get out my words and write. I went home and wrote my next Inner Monologues piece. I haven’t looked at it since because I like to throw things aside and revisit them a week later so I can view it with a fresh eye. I have been writing my “book” during my lunch breaks lately. It still never feels like I’m doing enough, though.
Oh, what seemed like horrible news actually turned out for the best—APOCALYPSE LOUNGE has closed. Just like that—all of a sudden. I got the email from Dave the bartender who books my shows. So…I freaked out and worried where in the world I’d have my next Inner Monologues. But by the end of the day (Tuesday) I had found a new venue: Mundial on 12th between A and B. It is absolutely perfect—clean sofas, spacious layout, flat screen TV’s at the bar. I will miss Apocalypse because in its grossness it definitely had charm. But we’ll see how this goes…If the show doesn’t work there, I have since made contacts at Parkside Lounge and Mo Pitkins which would both be great venues.
So save the date: December 05 at 8pm at Mundial. Should be killer…
Last night I met my now famous friend Nadine of http://www.jolienyc.com/, and Michele at Supper on 2nd for wine at like, 5:30. The bar was barely open, but we were ready to detox from our day. So good to just relax and catch up with good, old friends.
Afterward I went to Lil’ Frankies for Shannon’s bday. We talked about the pros and cons of prozac (hahah pros of prozac) and the harrowing effects of birth control pills. Everything makes us ladies crazy. Pizza and gelato and wine makes it better.
I should be working right now but I just wrote a little manuscript for a Christmas board book and my brain is a bit spent…
Posted by lexzog at Fri, November 11 | Comments (0)