lexBlog

« "Ok Lex, here's your deathcab..." | Main | "Build a Better Bush" »

Tue, October 26

Subway and Sister

Haven't written about a fun subway experience in a while, but here you go: I got on the B train on 52nd street and Broadway, and waited ten minutes. A voice over the loudspeaker finally said, "mwah lah vegerwereaa THE B TRAIN asskfjd telooo haffghk WILL NOT BE LEAVING THE shrmem. So I figured I should hop over and take the E train to 34th. I seem to do this every few weeks: I convince myself that one can transfer to the F,V at 34th street, get off the train, scratch my head that I can't find the sign that points to the F,V, then say "Oh Fudge" when I realize that I have just been caught by a case of subway amnesia...Anyway, I had to wait for another E, and took it to West 4th only to find a mob of people waiting on the platform, their necks craned to watch the train that would never come. Finally, the loudspeaker told us, "Frewlkj THE F TRAIN treelah tralah fmoo WILL NOT BE ARRIVING HERE. GO UPSTAIRS AND TAKE THE V, which will run as a V on the A platform." (I translated the last part so you wouldn't have to cover your ears like I did to the booming nonsense of the loudspeaker. Wasn't that nice of me?) Everyone waited on the "V" train, which didn't leave for another five minutes. Then we found ourselves on Spring Street. At this point, I could easily have been convinced that I am just delusional and had convinced myself that the voices in my head told me to take a V train on an A platform, but that it truly WAS an A. Thankfully, I am not going crazy: Everyone looked confused. We stopped, and when a brave spokesperson asked the conductor what line this train was running on, the conductor responded that she was mistakenly told to run on the A. So it WAS an A train! We'd have to go back to West 4th and then do some somersaults, feed a rabid monkey and run naked for two minutes, in order to get back to an F or V train. No thanks. The girl next to me asked where I was going, and we decided to split a cab. Well it was every man for himself at this point, and when I say every MAN I mean it, because men actually forged ahead to nab the cabs that we had attempted to hail. I finally made it, 45 minutes late to Linz's birthday dinner at SEA at 2nd and 5th.

I'm sitting at DRINK ME on 6th between B and C and I am supposed to be writing my "book", but my brother just told me a funny Ashley story (my sister). Which brings us to part two of this posting: The Sister part.

As I mentioned in my last post, Ashley had her tenth birthday party on Saturday. My mom took everyone to TGIF at the Palisades Center and then gave the girls some money to spend at Claire's Boutique.

As the story goes, Emily showed up at the party in a very cute dress. A cuter dress than Ashley's. Ashely proceeded to throw a fit, and announced at the top of her little lungs, "Emily looks like the BIRTHDAY GIRL and I just look like the GUEST!" So my mom, took Emily aside and said, "Emily. You're Ashley's friend, RIGHT?" and poor little Em just nodded her adorable little head and said, "Uh huh." My mom continued, "Then you wouldn't mind really, not wearing that dress right, and changing into something else?" Poor little Emily actually had to change out of her pretty party dress to please that tyrant who I used to affectionately call my sister, but now I know is just Atilla the Hun incarnate.

Linz told me that when her mom babysat my sister the other day, all she could hear for half an hour in the hall, was the pattering of little feet. Pitter pitter pitter. Patter patter patter. Over and over and over. Finally, my sister burst into the kitchen, breathless and asked, "Arlene, how many steps is a mile?"

What, 48 pounds is just not trim enough, Ash?

So maybe she isn't Atilla, but more of a mini-me.

Posted by lexzog at October 26, 2004 11:06 PM

Comments

OH MY GOD! If your mom always gives into her in these instances, she will never learn. Well for a girl with siblings, she sounds like an only child. At least she did not threaten to kill your mom for having another baby after seeing a sonogram photo, like I did, only to find out it was a picture of fibroids.

Posted by: Buttercup at October 26, 2004 11:19 PM

Well... in fact Emily was a little over dressed for the shopping trip. All the other girls were wearing pants and tops. Emily found a lovley pair of black pants in Ashley's closet and still looked very pretty.

Actually I kind of strired the pot 'cause when Emily came I did not realize that Ashley was already dressed for her party and I told her that she should go get dressed. Ooops... They were just playing nicely on the computer before that.

:)

Posted by: lexdad at October 29, 2004 06:38 AM

Post a comment