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Wed, September 22

The Vindow Vipers and...Music

The window in J's room hardly ever is covered by a shade. It is really large, and lets a huge amount of light in. When you look outside, you see a big billboard in the distance, for Armani. And perpendicular to it, is one side of part of his building. But there are no windows on that side of the building, that could see into his...Except those that belong to a penthouse apartment, which is empty at the moment.
But this morning, as we were kissing, I looked up and noticed for the first time EVER, there were people --contruction workers, up on the roof of that side of the building. He acknowledged it, but reassured me they couldn't see in. We continued to fool around, and eventually, I couldn't ignore the sounds of Spanish getting closer and closer. By the time we were both fully unclothed, it was too late: I looked out the window, and there they were, practically 7 feet away, hanging down from the building on one of those scaffolding contraptions...J got up to close the blinds, FINALLY, while they shouted and hollered protests (believe me, their tone transgressed the language barrier) for him not to. Later, J offered his own translation:

"Muy- Pablo- check out the ass on that chica in
there..it's getting waxed!"

(Note: I personally didn't know what "waxed" meant, but J explained that it was a sexual term of some sort. I still don't really get it. But it sounds funny.)

And now onto the music. I was thinking about this last night, on my way to meet my friend Stephen (from art class, as I always refer to him) at Cafe Colonial...I was listening to "Death Cab" on the subway, and that reminded me I hadn't listened to "Postal Service" in a long time. So I started listening to one of those songs..and it brought me back to like, Jan/Feb of this year, when I was absolutely obsessed with a guy I'd met at Welcome to the Johnsons, of all places (he deserves an archive actually). We'd never listened to PS together, but we had both agreed it helped us through some rough times (for him, the rough times were over, for me I was in the throes of them). I listened to nothing else for those three months of my infatuation with him...And now, when I listen to it, I feel sad, the way I did during that time in general (Grandma's passing away, the winter, other fun stuff), but also that bittersweet way you feel about guys that kind of broke your heart a little.

I think heart break is worse when you have music to associate with it.

But there are other kinds of music associations, those that are more sweet than bittersweet...When I hear Bob Dylan, I think of my college boyfriend. His music tastes were mainly in the classical realm, if he had musical preference at all. I usually like to date guys who can introduce me to something new to listen to. I hate to be the only one with a preference. So one day, he started playing Dylan and then he never stopped. To be honest, it took getting used to--the gritty voice, the not so singable tunes. But in the end, I fell in love with it, and when I hear it now, the music is wrapped up in this sexy, weird time--those three (or more, we dated on and off and on and off) years.

There's even music that I associate with guys, but that I never even listened to WHILE we were dating. This is what I call breakup music. My roomate bought David Gray right before I left for Paris by myself last December to go stay with my aunt there. I was dating my neighbor at the time, and though things were definitely "fun", I didn't have a settled feeling about it. Perhaps there was maybe one day that I can think of, in those, what was it, two months, that felt googly-eyed good. Not a good sign. I heard the album playing in her room the week before I left, but didn't pay close attention to it. When I got back, it was the first thing I wanted to listen to. And two nights later, he told me he wanted to "date other people, and wasn't ready for a relationship". (And by "date", he meant, "sleeping with" (because that's as serious as our relationship was). And by not being "ready for a relationship", he meant he had met someone else and would soon take her with him to St. Thoma with his family hree weeks after we split. Oh, and not long after that, he would have sex with her while I was in the next room watching TV with his roomates.) But at the time, I didn't speak "Guy", and instead of being angry, I was kind of crushed..David Gray was there on my CD player. I heard him for the first time a couple of months ago, and it made me think of that sad post-Paris time. But it was different-there was no bittersweet association between the music and the neighbor--just that time period itself. I don't think I've formed any moving musical associations with guys that treated me very badly. Or with guys that I didn't really fall for--the ones I'VE broken up with don't get musical accompanyments either :(

But relationships build on each other, and the one you're currently in seems to always be a billion times better than the ones you were in before (in the case of J and I, it not only seems to be, but acutally is, and that is unrefutable. But I'm trying to be general here as well). So everything you might have experienced in a past relationship is EVEN BETTER when you get to do them with your current love. Now when I hear PS, or Bob Dylan, yes, my brain goes back to those other boys, for like, a fraction of a second. But then I think, "wow, how lovely is this to be sharing this music, that has a little bit of heartbreak in it, with someone who makes me feel anything but broken." Now my brain has wandered...and I think I think about these "redos" I've done...places I've gone with J that I had gone to with other guys, that or places that I associate with a sad feeling--Paris, for example, that are just compeletely different, entirely something else now, because I'm experiencing them with someone who truly makes me happy.

Badman once talked about how you can decide to make new associatons between music and new people...can't find the entry to post it here.

I listened to David Gray at J's the other night, that is one of his faves too, and it is entirely associated with him now. Weird.

Posted by lexzog at September 22, 2004 11:49 PM

Comments

check it..

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=wax+that+ass&r=s&pos=3

Posted by: juuceman at September 23, 2004 01:13 AM

i know what you mean about musical associations. whenever i hear Santana's Supernatural album, it reminds me of waking up in my college boyfriend's room, and when I hear Phish's bouncing round the room, it reminds me of this guy I had "drama" with in high school. it's interesting how music especially conjures up these memories you had almost forgotten. maybe it's something about the "space" and atmosphere music creates that lends to a mood? i don't know i'm rambling.

but as bittersweet or maybe more accurately nostalgic as these memories are, my favorites are the ones are the ones like when I hear Def Leppard and i picture going crazy with my roommate on the dance floor at a particular dive/frat bar on the UWS or when I hear the Sound of Music, i imagine my family on some dreadfully long car trip where my sister and i sang every song from that movie from beginning to the end to pass the time, or Miles Davis' Kind of Blue album, sitting and reading in my college sophomore room with my roommate.

i actually went through this phase where i was really into always having music playing that fit the particular mood of that time and day. it could be dependent on my mood or the weather, etc. but i could get a little bit obsessive about it and it could change all the time. For example, if it was thunderstorming, i'd play Mozart's Requiem, or if it was sunny i'd like to play something like Jackson 5 or Gipsy Kings, or if it was a long car trip, classic rock like Tom Petty or something but i'd always have to find just the right music for the mood...

Posted by: soopaho at September 23, 2004 04:42 PM

I think you mean this one...

http://badmanbadplace.blogspot.com/2004_08_08_badmanbadplace_archive.html#109235210463682990

wax dat ass... heh...

Posted by: Eric Castillo at September 23, 2004 08:20 PM

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